Monday, May 23, 2011

it's been awhile

Hey there... I haven't stopped by here in quite some time.  We have been busy with out of town trips and out of town visitors and there have been many decisions made and things are moving right along in this little life of ours.

I started going to see a counselor two weeks ago and if you haven't ever tried it, I'd highly recommend it.  Most of the hour involves me sitting there and telling her everything, and since she doesn't know me, I often have to start at the beginning.  As I'm talking and telling someone who is unbiased all about my life and the things that make me sad and happy, I often come to realizations about myself on my own.  I realized that I used to do the very same thing by either driving over to her house or just calling my Grandmother.  There is something to be said about telling someone all of the thoughts that are rolling around in your head so you can actually process them instead of dwelling on them.  It has added another "thing" to do in my week, but I don't mind juggling other things to make it work.

Speaking of big "things" to do, I did sign up for and get accepted into a yoga teacher training program.  My classes officially start on June 8th, but I can start counting all of the yoga classes that I'm taking now as part of my required hours for the program.  I've been trying to go at least 4 times a week.  Adam goes to at least one class a week with me and sometimes he's been going on his own.  He's lost some weight and looks great.  I haven't lost a stinkin' pound but I can do regular push up in my TRX class without using knees or feeling like I might die so that is something!  I do get nervous about the class, feeling like maybe I won't be good enough but then when I'm in the studio and having a particularly good practice (which happens almost all the time these days), I remember that this is what I feel really comfortable doing.  Since I started telling people that I'm doing this program, I've already heard about some teaching opportunities.  I am excited to start classes and get that certification!

In therapy, one of the things I realized that we've been doing (A LOT!) and that makes me feel depressed is taking things we'd like to do and saying "oh we'll do that when we move to Texas".  Stuff such as getting a dog.  I've wanted to get a dog together since we first started dating (and I almost had Adam convinced then!) and we have been putting it off and saying we'd do it when we move.  We also have been saying that about getting a car, buying things, bringing our wedding presents that were given to us in Texas to Chicago, etc.  Obviously, we have to sell the condo first (more on that later) but we do plan to take the money we'll save by renting toward a dog and buying a car.  I feel like that will help us feel a lot more set up before we make our big move, whenever that may be and hopefully help decrease the sense of urgency we both feel all the time.  At this point, I am realistically expecting that we'll be here another winter.  We also made a commitment to each other that if we reach a certain point (quite some time in the future, not anytime soon) that we'll just move to Texas and get whatever jobs we can to stay afloat while Adam looks for something in his field.  I think that having the Chicago address hurts his chances sometimes because companies don't want to deal with our relocation and from all I have heard there are plenty of qualified candidates looking for jobs that already live in the state.

As far as the condo goes, I wish I had better news.  We are going to drop our price this week to what we think is a more "sellable" number.  It unfortunately involves Adam and I most likely bringing money to the table at closing.  However, we just want to be done with this condo and start paying the money back that we owe on it and move on with our lives.  I look at this place as a huge sore spot in my unhappiness here because, whether it is or not, I see it as what holds us back.  I will be happy to pay much smaller rent amounts in the future.  It's going to be awhile before I feel like I'm ready to get back into the real estate market.  I am hoping and praying that dropping our price is going to make a sale a more realistic possibility.  I'd love to put this chapter of our lives behind us and work on the debt we'll incur from living here.

That's pretty much all that is going on around here.  Our days go by so fast when you factor in that we have something going on almost every night after work, whether it's yoga or another work out, book club (me), Bulls games (Adam), therapy appointments, etc.  I can't believe I only have two and a half weeks until yoga school starts!

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